I think the hardest part of being discontented with the current state of your life isn’t really the part where, you know, you are discontented.

I believe the far crueler part is when you catch a glimmer of hope of something wonderful, something amazing, and you hold your breath for a tiny moment and allow yourself to get excited that maybe, oh so very quietly maybe, this could be the catalyst for it all.

Is this the magnesium to start producing oxygen so you can take in a deep wonderful breath of life and actually start to live in hope and wonderment of better days?

Nope! You’ve made mustard gas… >_<


And then that precarious balance you had is destabilised and you fall over.

And then you have to pick yourself up like always, and you do. And then you just exist, wandering around looking for that sweet breath that will make you feel alive….

Until you are so sick of false hopes and bated breaths that you try so hard to forget the thing you know you will get excited about, because you know how it will end, how the dance is done and all you ever know becomes disappointment and hardship, unable to see even hope for a brighter tomorrow because it’s just too damn hard to go through.

I love to dance, but if you try too hard, you will injure yourself and look like a fuck-wit whilst doing it…

Even if you have rhythm…